Reflections on Karma and the Holidays

When the holidays come around, people start talking about family issues. I find this interesting. Family dynamics are magnified at this time of year.

I think of this as our karma manifesting itself. Let me explain. Karma can be summed up as the law of cause and effect. I think of karma as leftover energy or charge from events in our current or previous lifetimes. If you are doing and thinking good or bad thoughts about a person or situation, it will influence the outcome of the current situation as well as future ones. I also believe that when karma shows up, it’s an opportunity to use the dynamic as a teacher, to take the charge out and to learn to the lesson.


Let me give an example. A long time ago I was married to my son’s father. It was not an easy marriage. I tried all kinds of things to improve the relationship – therapy, church, prayer, meditation, etc. Nothing helped. There came a day that I knew I had done all I could. My son and I needed to leave. I was not leaving mad. I was just leaving. The physical separation helped further clarity that leaving was the right thing to do.

Sometime after the separation, I was talking to my ex on the phone. He was into his usual yukky behavior. I was trying hard to hold steady. Suddenly I realized that my son was twenty-one and an adult. No longer did I  need to talk to my ex!  So, I stopped the conversation. I let him know what I had just realized. We did not need to talk anymore. “Have a great life”, I told him! Then I hung up. There was a feeling of relief and of being ‘done’. I had changed the dynamic. I had completed my karma with him. Even as I talk about the situation now, I feel no charge around it.

Did any of this change my ex? I don’t know, but it’s not about him, it’s about me. I now see my ex as a teacher. Did I learn the lesson? I think so – ‘do your best and hold steady to your beliefs’.


Big Hugs and Much Love,